THIS IS A FUCKING HOLIDAY
Updated: Dec 30, 2022
When you say ‘staycation’
it makes me want to shove you
into a suitcase with no wheels
and heft you into the boot at 6am
so we can drive along B roads
without getting caught behind caravans.
I’ll let you out
only when you’re ready
to properly appreciate
the bleak and beautiful seafront,
the Knickerbocker Glory before breakfast,
Harbour Fish and Chips for dinner and tea,
the walk up to the wallabies,
North Sea swimming,
a caravan to play cards in
and a girl with a plastic monkey
clipped to her collar.
Until then,
keep it zipped.

Photo by Ali Karimiboroujeni from Pexels